A Spiritual and Energetic Perspective on Postpartum Depression
Guest Blogger, Rev. Liliana Barzola
Imagine your heart is a container. It is holding all the pain and bliss you’ve experienced. It has all these magical chambers and different rooms.
As we grow and develop we try to stay in the good feeling parts of our hearts, where the playful and wonderful feelings are stored. When we experience loss we often section that part of our heart off. Like a room that was once a fun place to play, it becomes a dark and dreary part of our heart. We close that part of our heart off. We don’t want to look back or feel that again. We do this all the time and pretty much without noticing that we do it.
When your beautiful baby is earthside and beaming you with pure love and bliss, it’s overwhelming. This child stares into your eyes in a way no human has ever looked at you before. The energy is so pure and divine. You feel such depth. And then something strange happens. That baby love beam hits one of those quarantined off rooms and bursts the door open. The pain floods out to be dealt with. You can’t quite figure out how something can feel so good and so bad all at the same time.
If you feel depressed and sad, this is normal. Because the more this child beams love the more healing your heart undergoes. So please change your thinking around this being a “bad” thing. Please whisper to yourself that this is good pain, that this is the healing chambers of your heart that haven’t seen the light of day for many years.
I remember that I could not even access a heart centered mothering tone of voice until I had my first baby. I had to go through all the pain of turning away from him and feeling the dull ache and joyfulness simultaneously. And I felt like a terrible mother, because it wasn’t just pure bliss for me it was intense heart aching love. And no one explained this to me. Everyone just expected me to be blissed out and I wasn’t. I was hurting. It was almost painful to look at someone that beautiful.
But after the healing he did to my heart, I found a loving tone of voice that seeps out of me for him. And for myself too. Be kind to yourself.
The Spiritual and Energetic Perspective on Why Children are So Exhausting?
Children are exhausting creatures, because they are so profoundly present. As adults we are used to checking out, spacing out, throwing ourselves into unconscious work. Children do not allow us to do this. Every time you float away into a private thought they pull you back with their presence. They need something, they feel you leave, they reach up and bring you back to earth. That’s why mom’s get really good at multitasking and dealing with repetitive interruptions.
We understand that the conversation we are trying to have with a friend is kind of like climbing a mountain. You have to have all your gear (something for the kids to be entertained while you chat), then there are a million sights and sounds as you climb and take in the view (like kids interrupting you and bringing you back to the moment), and the entire time you hold the goal of the top of the mountain in your mind (like remembering what you last fucking said and trying to speak to the next point.).
So remember that you need a break to space out. Taking time away from your kids to go consciously unconscious is very healthy. This means getting help so you can dream, lay around and watch Netflix. Yes, Netflix actually makes you a better parent.
Guest Writer: Rev. Liliana Barzola www.lotuslantern.org
Rev. Liliana Barzola has conducted over 20,000 in-person and phone counseling sessions, and taught over 600 students, since 2002. Her practice, Lotus Lantern Healing Arts, has an international clientele including individuals in Australia, Italy, Germany, Japan, Canada, Venezuela, Africa, the UK, and nearly every US state. An intuitive since childhood, Liliana possesses the ability to see a client’s aura and chakra systems. Using this gift, she enables individuals, couples, and organizations to find clarity and direction.
Note from Danielle. I love Liliana’s Spiritual and Energetic Perspective on postpartum depression. I believe she is right about what happens when a little one beams light into your life. I have witnessed it with my own eyes with friends and clients many times (in both doula and counseling settings). As a psychologist who specializes in Maternal Mental Health, I would be remiss if I didn’t also add that if you are struggling to make sense of the pieces that have been stirred up from your birth or motherhood experience, there are providers who can help and support through this time. Please reach out if you have postpartum depression or anxiety. To a doctor, counselor, mentor, friend, partner. Tell someone and seek professional help if needed. You can find support here https://www.facebook.com/mamathrivevillage/